Thursday, January 19, 2006

Scheduled Appearances

We have a lot to cover, so let's get right to it.

First of all, much props to the Football Gods. Yes we lost, but not for lack of opportunities. I mean, they gave the NFL MVP a concussion, thereby eliminating him and his wily running ways and we do nothing with it. Such is life with only 2 receivers, one of which isn't even a wide receiver. I think that if we get a good complement to Moss we'll be doing well next year. For now, I'm less excited about the post season now that the Colts and the Pats are out of it, but the Super Bowl still holds its usual junk-food and summer movie commercial filled allure so I'll be there regardless of the combatants. And by God, there will be Poppers.

As you are all well aware now, this site has not become synonymous with regular content. Oh sure, every week or so I drop by to blather on about things, but were there some sort of time keeping device that measured weeks, rather than seconds, I would not suggest you use this site to synchronize said device lest you end up with a horribly unsynchronized situation.

I am making moves to rectify this, but first, an explanation. I'd like to spin a tale now about personal woe and how after volunteering at the animal shelter and the retirement home, I barely have enough time to rehabilitate injured seabirds, but the fact is that I am a supremely lazy human being. I actually have reams and reams of ideas to write about, but the effort involved is something I can't be bothered with. That's not entirely true. I enjoy writing and knowing that the half-dozen of you actually read it, but I always find something else to do, something else being video games. Seeing as I have no plans to give up playing video games, I've decided to implement a schedule here at the homestead. Behold the majiks of the calendar!

I know that many bloggers, although I am loathe to call myself one of those, hate schedules because they like to update when the mood hits them. Well, at 33, I'm well aware of my failings, and being unable to do most things without at least a smidge of prodding is one of them. The schedule shall be that smidge. This will also give you, dear reader, assurances that when you come here on key days, there will be new content, glistening like a newborn, just without all the snot and horribly swollen genitalia.

This brings me to my next topic, which is what shall we be writing about? As you know, we cover a bunch of topics here, but my interests lie mainly with video games, and every other thing in my life that isn't video games. To that end, I'll have one post a week that focuses on video games, and one that doesn't. For those of you that don't care about video games, please don't take this as an excuse to not read my ramblings, because I can assure you that my posts about gaming will be filled with the same fluffy goodness as my other posts. That's like, a fuckload of fluffy goodness.

Finally, and this is what I'm actually most excited about, is that I'm going to do a weekly column about science. Yes, science. I have a degree in Physics, and presently all it does is annoy my father with its spent promises of scientific glory and its massive higher educational pricetag. Well, that ends now. I read few blogs every day, but John Scalzi's Whatever is one of them. In this stirring post, he talks about his unmet life goals. One of them was to evangalize science. When I read that I was like, "Hell yes". I love science, and all of it's scientific goodness, and it pains me to see folks not be as excited about the underpinnings of their universe as I am. To that end, I'm planning on writing a post every week that takes something scientific and breaks it down in readable, hopefully humorous English. This will take research on my part, which means I get to learn things too, so it's a win-win. I would also like to open this part of the site up to you, dear reader. Through the comments, or by emailing me at suburbanjoe at gmail dot com, send me any scientific questions and I will endeavor to answer them.

That being said, I'm not going to write your goddamned thesis, neither will I do your book report on Madame Curie. Goddammit Timmy, you've had that assignment for weeks, just sit down and do it. I am also not going to limit myself to the hard sciences like physics, chemistry, coke and heroin. I'll also do columns on the soft sciences like psychology, anthropology, weed and whippets. Heh-heh, whippets.

So, my little calandar monkeys, the schedule looks like this. Monday is gaming day, as I'll be fresh off of a weekend of digital tomfoolery. Wednesday is science day, for those of you that need a healthy dollop of fancy book learnin' to get them over the hump, and Friday will be freestyle day. Freestyle Fridays, if you will. Yes, I will. I will indeed. I'll still drop knowledge on you on unscheduled days, to ensure things stay unpredictiable, so make sure you come back daily. Hourly is preferable. Hopefully this will keep me writing, keep you reading and we'll all learn something. Well, mostly you, because I'm like, wicked smart.


Charles McCarthy said...

You are the same age as jesus.

suburbanjoe said...

This is true. And I have nowhere near the parental pressure that guy did. Man, now I feel even lazier than before.